Is perfectionism overrated?
Hello.
My name is Bob.
I am a quiet, perfectionist, who tends to overthink everything.
That was absolutely clear to me as I worked on the initial assignment in my Masters course at Briercrest College.
Submit, Submit
I lost count of the number of edits and total editions of an 8-page report on four books and part of the New Testament. And I literally struggled with pushing the SUBMIT ASSIGNMENT button to release my work.
True confession: I delayed submitting it for 12 hours. Made some edits. Slept on it. Made more edits. And at last, still didn’t submit it.
24 hours later, the next morning, I submitted my imperfect piece. The first time in 46 years I’ve had to hand over academic work that counts for marks.
I have to laugh at myself.
Illustration by Golden Cosmos
Perfectionism
The question for October 14th in the devotional that Jocelyn and I share was, “Is perfectionism overrated?”Jocelyn answered, “We should always do our best but perfection is too stressful.”
My answer was, “No, but it is impossible to achieve and this has led to needless anxiety.”
You might be a perfectionist if you have to fight to resist correcting people for the misuse of words.
You might be a perfectionist if you think almost perfect means failure.
Or if 99 people compliment you and one criticizes you and only the criticism counts.
I Understand Me
I am well aware that striving for flawless results makes people fear mistakes, leading to endless second-guessing and analysis paralysis.
There are three dangers I intentionally work to overcome:
Waiting too long or doing extensive, unnecessary research to avoid making a wrong move.
Over planning or rewriting messages and tasks to control every possible outcome.
Obsessing over what other people meant by a look or a comment, leading to unneeded, internal, unspoken conflict.
Physical Echoes
I am good at holding physical stress, including a clenched jaw, tight shoulders and chest, and holding my breath.
Even as I type this I am aware that I am clenching my teeth and have to relax
I’ve learned to coach myself to breathe. Just breathe.
And when all of the above comes into play I know I have overstretched myself. And then I look for an exit plan.
An exit plan is to see when my responsibilities will have a window of 4-5 hours or even a day in the next two weeks. And then I look forward to a break.
On. my calendar, I can see a morning in nine days when I have nothing scheduled. Seeing that space/margin is helpful. I just have to get there.
John Macaskill says, “My gut treats an open hour as a problem to solve instead of a tank to fill.” Yep.
Want to see where running low has your focus and steadiness right now? The free Focus Score grades you across 8 areas in under 5 minutes.
The website says the questions are designed for males, however why not try it and see what you find? Take your Focus Score: https://focusnowtraining.com/focus-score
Why?
So, why write this?
Why be vulnerable. Because a REVwords reader may be just like me. And maybe they can see that how they feel and act does not make them inferior or broken.
Did you know that overthinking is one of the most widely shared cognitive habits ever measured? 73% of adults aged 25 to 35 identify as overthinkers. (“Overthinking Statistics: The Research in Numbers,” mindflex.world/overthinking-statistics, 2026.)
Everyone has a structural weakness. It can be something you never grow out of; you simply learn to adapt and make the best of it.
With God’s sufficient help, I can. You can.
Can you relate? Please join the conversation and post a comment below. It doesn’t have to be perfect.
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Good Morning Pastor Bob…I enjoyed the blog this morning. I totally relate to it. I am a Type A Personality as well. Even when I respond to your blog…I can read it over & over again…& make sure that there are no spelling mistakes & make sure that what I say …is exactly what I mean. There was one incident…where I questioned myself…whether I should respond to a comment only aimed at me…but, others had commented the same or similar issues. The blog …where you pointed out…that folks are less likely to say unfavourable things about people they know…& will target strangers without hesitation. Let’s just say…you handled it with diplomacy…as usual. The discussion hit a nerve…& it is exactly what is dividing people…even amongst our congregation. It is sad & disturbing to witness amongst “Christians”. To see some folks spewing hate for others. I just shake my head. It is like venom. I am also sad, that you are taking a break from writing your blog until January of 2027…but, it is totally understandable…because you are in the middle of your Masters. I also find out things about you…that are amazing. You are always busy…when most folks are retired & leisurely taking life in…with no major scheduled appointments. Busier than I am…at this particular point in time. Thank you for sharing this blog with us & stay safe when travelling to the Ukraine on November 20th…which also happens to be my birthday. I will be thinking about you…if your trip will still be a safe journey. So much happens there daily. Who knows what it will be like in November?
Have a great weekend! Keep on, keeping on. ❤️ I am going to miss the blog…but priorities must prevail.
Hi Julie. My plan is to write one blog a week rather tha two or three, so these will keep coming.
And I will keep looking forward to your comments, like this one.
Pastor Bob…I would be lying if I said I didn’t look forward to your blogs on Mondays and Fridays, but your plate is full. Plus you are working on your Masters ( good for you) and travelling to the Ukraine during a very dark and dangerous time in its history. I believe that is more than enough justification to cut back on your blog.
I look forward to the blogs that we will be receiving especially those from war torn Ukraine. Give yourself a break and take a little more time for yourself and Jocelyn. You have been an amazing inspiration and would continue to be so regardless of the blogs. I feel blessed to know you and thank you for all that you have given me, in person and through your blogs.
Will continue to pray for Jocelyn and yourself, with Love…
Ernie
Thank you, Ernie. I am thankful the Lord brought you into my life many years ago.
Always appreciative of your wisdom and support. We’ve been through a few things together.