I just happened to get hit with one of life’s curve balls.
It fooled me; I didn’t see it coming and I certainly wasn’t prepared.
The internal injuries were severe.
There were days I didn’t think I would survive such trauma.
Clearly, there were no winners in this game.
No one gets married with the intent to get a divorce.
Wendy Connors played fastball since she was a young girl and was picked up by many teams, winning several championships along the way. I love how Wendy uses her love for fastball to share a portion of her life story. Wendy’s leadership skills and devotion helped start North Pointe’s Divorce Care ministry, the Single and Parenting ministry and the Singles ministry.
The Good
The good? Hmmm, I got nothing.
A divorce is not nice. Many lives are affected. Families are shattered and all that you once knew is changed forever.
In many cases, children sit in the middle asking which team they should choose.
Divorce is a game changer.
I have never heard someone say … that was the best divorce ever you should try it sometime!!
It’s a game I wish no one had to play.
The Bad
The reconditioning of your heart takes years and it never heals completely. The pain is intense, and there is no quick fix.
Sadly, the thought of quitting the game of life becomes appealing.
During such time of intense hurt, it’s then you realize you can’t let your team down. Your kids, family, friends … they are watching and waiting. You must continue to play through the pain.
The Reality
With God’s help, you will heal; you will survive.
Are things different than before, yes but you will adjust to the “new normal”.
A divorce does not define you. Nor does having a partner define you. You are God’s child and finding your identity through Him is the Home Run.
No other player can fulfill all your needs and it’s not realistic to expect that they will.
Life has many curve balls; life is tough; life can change in a blink of an eye and yes … wait for it … life is NOT fair.
The Pain
Jesus did not keep this a secret.
“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” John 15:33 (NIV)
Jesus knew about pain.
No one better than He deserved MVP (most velocity of pain award).
He certainly “took one for the team” and only He truly understands the depth of our pain.
I did not choose divorce; it chose me.
I did not want to be another “statistic” but here I am.
I did not want my children to have two homes but they do.
We cannot change the pitch we are thrown in life, but we can choose to take a walk with Him to rediscover our game plan. We have all been crushed by a line drive or dropped the ball in the game of life and experienced the consequence. We are all playing the same game and still in training.
Our Choice
As our coach, God prepares us for the tough games. Yes, there will be wins and losses but He always promises us another game.
My divorce helped me realize I can survive the curve balls that come my way.
It’s a choice … I can either sit on the bench in defeat, or I can continue to train with my coach and perhaps do a little coaching of my own, teaching others what He has taught me.
With determination, I say,
“PUT ME IN COACH. I’M READY TO PLAY!”
APPLICATION: Please leave a comment for Wendy below.
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We are so pleased to see Wendy’s contributions in a variety of singles ministries. Rick and Jan Kelly, DivorceCare Leaders
Thank you Rick & Jan, it was a pleasure to start this journey with you. God bless you for your continued passion with Divorce Care.
You are courageous Wendy! It is important to show others that there is hope. You are a great example of the character of NPCC.
Thank you Kendra, there is hope in Him and I am so grateful to be a part of the NPCC family. The opportunity to meet women of strength such as yourself has been a true blessing!
Write it. It’s a game changer.
Agreed Tim. I believe God has a lot to say, may His words continue to flow …
Well Wendy, you’ve stopped the Jays, went ahead with a cannon,
and clinched the season! I’m glad the Coach has you in play.
Hosea 10:12a “Sow for yourselves righteousness, reap the fruit
of unfailing love… ”
It isn’t so much about what has been done to us, it’s more about
the possibilities of the new game. Let’s get on the field and play ball!
Batter up my dear friend, there are many games to be played!!
Thank u bro Bob 4 sharing ur story. Pray 4 me I don’t feel good I have a very bad pain in my stomach.