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I was in a meeting with seven veteran leaders from North Pointe. As I looked around the room it dawned on me that we all had one thing in common – marriage.

Some quick math revealed we totaled 313 years of marriage experience.

Surely we must have something good to offer others from our experience.

So I asked them their secrets to wedded bliss.

Secrets of Happy Marriages

“Be flexible.  Blessed are the flexible.”

“Marry a great girl.”

“Embrace the journey!”

“On our 32nd anniversary I gave my wife a sympathy card.”

“Find a spouse who is easy to get along with.”

“To keep your marriage brimming with love in the loving cup, whenever you’re wrong, admit it; whenever you’re right, shut up.”

“Always put the Lord first.”

“Pray together. Things go better with prayer.”

Creating Certainty in Life

I love our leaders. Their sense of humor, humility and authentic faith is contagious.

Each one is promise keeper.

Promises create an island of security in an ocean of uncertainty.

Promises make life more stably human. Too often couples say “I do” and then they don’t.

Promise keeping is a powerful means of grace in a time when people can hardly depend on each other to remember, let alone live by their word.

3 Powers of a Promise

1. Promises create your identity.

We become what we are committed to. Thirty eight years ago when I promised Jocelyn Blades that I would be committed to her in sickness and in health, rich or poor, good times or bad, til death us do part. That commitment made me her husband.

Over five decades ago I believed on Jesus as my Saviour.  I promised to live for Him, by His grace. That commitment made me a Christian.

Thirty seven years ago I made a promise to live an ethical and spiritual life as an ordained minister.  Sticking to that promise not only keeps my identity as a minister but I am kept by that promise from the consequences of bad choices that would diminish, if not destroy, the sacred role I live out.

2. Promise keeping creates an island of certainty in an ocean of uncertainty. 

When a person with integrity makes a promise, they are saying, “When you can count on nothing else, you can count on me.”

Somethings are worth saying twice…or endlessly.

3. Promise keeping means your word is your bond.

All the legal documents in the world cannot keep a promise from being broken. However, a person of their word never needs legal pressure to keep their promise.

Treasure relationships with people who don’t need a legal document to keep them honest.

QUESTION: What’s your secret to a “happily-ever-after?” Please leave a comment below.


I write to inspire people to be real, grow an authentic faith in Jesus, enjoy healthy relationships and discover their life purpose. If this material is helpful to you, please follow me.

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Bob Jones

Happily married to Jocelyn for 45 years. We have two adult sons, Cory and his wife Lynsey and their son Vincent and daughter Jayda; Jean Marc and his wife Angie and their three daughters, Quinn, Lena and Annora. I love inspiring people through communicating, blogging, and coaching. I enjoy writing, running, and reading. I'm a fan of the Double E, Bruins, Celtics, Red Sox and Pats. Follow me on Twitter @bobjones49ers

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